Self-Care = Health care
Self-Care = Health care
Featuring: Christine Means
I’ve been working on me.
In this life I have many roles. I share responsibilities with others. My role as a mother is the most important part of my life. However, there is always a voice inside screaming at me: take care of you first! Over extending myself, over committing, sleeping less and doing more for others is just the way I was raised to believe a woman works. An Indian woman is always capable of doing more. I’ve seen it. Dig deeper and cross that finish line wearing your most beautiful pair of earrings, hair fixed, carrying your children while being hungry and tired but still smiling. And laugh soulfully while doing it all. This type of belief and living can get tiring. Yet, it is what I strive for. I strive to be like my mother, who never cracked under pressure. Like my aunts, who always laughed beautifully in the midst of hardship. Like my Grandma, who cared for a herd of sheep, children, her husband, aging parents, and siblings. As much as I value these superwoman abilities I know that over generations they have taken their toll on us all. This is why we have to care for ourselves. We have to give ourselves time and energy to renew our spirits and bodies. In my daily life I try to maintain my mental health, physical strength, spiritual connection and emotional wellness. I have come to accept that these take practice, effort and commitment from me. Through these practices I am able to go with the flow, accomplish my daily tasks, be a happy mother and most importantly maintain a strong connection between my mind and my spirit.
One of my most important lessons learned in life is acceptance. Acceptance of myself. Learning to accept myself is more of a goal. Something I try to practice and would like to do but it doesn’t always happen. My inner thoughts can be harsh. I would never let anyone talk to me the way that I talk to myself. A lack of acceptance usually comes when I have expectations of myself that I don’t meet. The expectations can be work life, home responsibilities or family commitments. My expectations are high and there are many. Each day I aim to accomplish as many things as possible. Usually there are 100 little things that I expect myself to do each day. Most of them have rolled over from yesterday, last week and last month. I have come to learn that I have to accept where I am at each day in life without the rollover of yesterday’s unrealistic to do list. I have to practice acceptance right here and now. I will tell myself that it is ok to accept things as they are. I have to accept myself for who I am today and where I am at in life. Doing this allows a feeling of calmness to settle in to my thoughts for just a brief moment.
My visions in life are constant. I love to dream. When I can’t sleep at night or am stuck waiting I love to visualize. Creating a vision in my head of what I would love to see and want to happen is a form of therapy for me. The visions I create are realistic goals for myself. Sometimes I envision a clean kitchen and it makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside. Sometimes I envision me and my husband taking a warm nap. Most of my dreams are extremely personal and I don’t know if they will ever come to fruition but a girl can dream. I encourage day dreaming and creating a vision that allows you to explore a desire, hope and goal. Make it personal and be honest without limits.
Create a space for you
Creating a space for you to have is crucial. Whether it be a physical space or a space in time you have to carve out a place for you. I have had to create a space for me to simply be. A space that allows sacred me time. Time that encourages meditative thoughts, prayers and energy. My space varies and maintaining it is hard fought. I move my yoga mat from room to room. I sit in the dark of morning next to a pile of laundry before anyone else is awake. My space depends on my family. I use to want my space to be perfect and pretty but I’ve accepted that it doesn’t happen. Wherever you can claim a space for you to connect with you, do it. The ability to sit with my thoughts, focus my prayers, set my daily intentions and calm my energy are life changers for me. I am a better person when I make this a priority in my days.